The power of capturing a feeling

I started making films — content, really — when I was in my mid 20’s and feeling kinda lost and disconnected from any sorta community in Denver.

I go through these intense waves of morose and depression, and given all that was going on in my life at the time — grandparents died, moved to Denver to escape life in the big city, no clue what I wanted to do after sales career-wise, inherited more money than I knew what to do with — the depression was really starting to rear its ugly head.

I decided to shake things up in my career, so I left a sales job that was making me miserable and tried to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up.

(ps there’s a powerful story in here, but if you wanna skip all of the word-stuff, you can drop straight to the TLDR or watch this video 👇)

I was promoting this event that I’d decided I wanted to give myself 30-days to launch (yay, stress), a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood (boo—hiss) that was really just an excuse to host an epic party.

I got a bunch of people to throw in liquor on the cheap; rented 200+ silent discos headsets; hired a few DJs; and invited a hundreds of strangers to this rager in what was essentially a co-working space.

(Thank you, Regus!)

As a means to probably distract myself from the immense amount of stress I was under coordinating all of this shit and the feelings I didn’t want to feel, I started to send these videos out via Facebook Messenger.

The videos would essentially just be me saying, “Hey [insert person’s name here] I saw you’re planning on attending my [mild rager] in July, and just wanted to say ‘Hi!’ and super excited you’re coming.”

That’s it. Less than 15-seconds, filmed on my crappy iPhone’s front-facing camera.

Nothing crazy.

And what happened was:

• People attended. (It sold out.)

• And many of those attendees became actual friends.

What I started to notice was that I wasn’t just using film and content to market to people. I wasn’t selling anything other than, This Will be Fun and Worth Your Money.

What I was trying to do was to communicate a feeling.

Connection. Warmth. Good Vibes.  

I wanted people, even if they were complete strangers, to feel a sense of connection.

To the cause. To the other people there. To everything.

And that started with me.

And I often forget that when I’m making things.

And it sucks.

I forget about what it’s about, or why I started, or what I’m doing here.

The closer I’m able to connect with that core feeling — the feeling behind whatever it is I’m trying to create and to put out in the world — the better I feel.

Because it becomes less about a result and more about a feeling.

We can’t control what’s going to happen with anything.

We can control how we feel about it.

And I think that’s really all films are and what stories ultimately support.

They support a feeling.

Stories are about capturing a feeling, and articulating it with the world in an interesting way.

Think: Godfather; Barbie; Titanic.

Revenge; Empowerment; Freedom.

Godfather (1972): Post Vietnam; Watergate-era in America; civil rights backlash. America’s institutions were seemingly flawed and crumbling, anger’s brewing.

Titanic (1997): Peak optimism around globalization, before it’s all fallen to shit. America’s making big-time money (Internet), and gender-roles are starting to shift. There’s a sense of, “Anything’s possible!”

Barbie (2023): Post-pandemic, #MeToo, one of the first big movies people can see but also one about breaking through and breaking out and just joyful and playful. It takes all of what made classics like Singin’ in the Rain so magical, sprinkles in a little Gosling and Robbie action and wham!

Why you should record yourself (seriously)

Which is why I also think you should record yourself.

There’s something beautiful and magical about connecting with a feeling, and learning how to articulate that using your voice.

For me, that’s literally how it all started, and now I’m telling stories at much, much bigger scales (and smaller) than I ever could’ve dreamed of.

Feelings are often just these ideas that are floating around in the ether, but often that other people are feeling.

Those who are able to capture that and articulate it in a powerful way — think of people like MLK Jr. or Lincoln or Gandhi — get throngs of support simply because they’re articulating that feeling so well, and succinctly.

Historically, many people have turned to writing in order to communicate feelings and have found great success through that.

But, frankly, unless you actually enjoy writing, it can be so tiring and cumbersome that I couldn’t recommend anything less.

Filming yourself, on the other hand — while, arguably more uncomfortable — is just so, so much easier.

And, frankly, with the advent of Zooms and Google Meets and social media and all that, we’re likely far more familiar with that experience than even the act of sitting down in front of a computer to wax poetic on anything.

Try it.

Especially if you’re uncomfortable with it.

Just send a note to a friend expressing gratitude; or, followup a meeting with a client or prospect with some quick notes; or, maybe even somebody you’re interested in.

At the end of the day, all we’ve got are our feelings.

And often, we hold them back because it’s scary to share those things.

And yet, they’re inside all of those.

So let them out, and see what happens.

TLDR; UPDATES ON LIFE

A few things happening these days.

1. We just relaunched our website for Good Couch Money, including a lot of our recent work. Would love your thoughts on it.
   

2. I made this incredible work-of-art for a 2-year-old’s birthday.
   

3. We’re making progress on ‘How to Life’ > mostly in the early stages of adding some title animations + what-not to add a bit of texture.
   
   Early sample:

Reply with some thoughts on it 🙂 

Michael Kilcoyne